Abramelin, day 226

Morning rite went well.

Used the extra hour with daylight savings being gone to workout, I badly needed it.

Got sent home early from Salem job, with the weather being as it is (SNOW wtf), it was pretty much dead.

Noon rite went well.

Totally wiped, guessing due to the daylight savings fiasco. I HATE the way this screws with my bodyclock AND I haven’t seen sun in too long. Ugh.

Evening rite went well, save for a crying kitty outside my door. :-/

Abramelin, day 199

Morning rite and noon prayer rite went well.

Today was phone interview, work, more recruiter contacts, and just general Monday whatever.

It also occurred to me how many of my goals could be helped by doing more chakra balancing meditations. Root is so much better than it used to be but could stand more love. I’ve been looking for more avenues of increased manifestation and I think that might grease the gears for me, so to speak. I typically listen to a bunch of subliminal mp3s with sounds of waves and water as I go to sleep that are for each of the chakras, so I made a separate playlist specifically for the ones which need the most amount of help.

Met a friend for dinner whom I haven’t seen in a while. Between job drama, kitty drama, car drama, family drama, Abramelin drama, been pretty separated from the world. Not a bad thing, probably the only way to get a high extrovert into doing so.

Got to get in a brief cuddle with my kitties. It’s wonderful to see my previously sick cat running about like a kitten. She’s also light enough to pick up and cuddle now, and makes the most adorable purrs when I do so.

Grateful.

Evening rite went well.

Abramelin, day 192

Morning rite and noon prayer rite went well.

More purification issues but I think I finally nailed it.

Been spending my time trying to focus on what inspires me. no matter how crazy. Screw it.

Kitties remain healthy and cute. Job sitch, I expect to probably be out of a job by around end of Oct. They’re even bringing someone in for a few months and mentioned him working on my project. ┬áMy only desires for this job right now are a) as many paychecks as possible b) a very good recommendation from my boss and for him to continue to be happy with me and c) apt timing for its ending so that I can do the week long invocations to end the Abramelin.

Evening rite went well.

Abramelin, day 190

Morning and noon rites went well.

Today my cat went in for glucose testing, with great news: she is no longer diabetic. Thank the gods. I still have to dose her food with antibiotics and the potassium supplement and she still has to stay on the special food, but no more shots. This is WONDERFUL.

Got a combination energy healing and massage. Kept getting told how “great” my energy was, finally got asked if I do energy work. Yes, I definitely do. :)

Went to my first coven event in ages, really missed everyone. Both this ritual and the next one I’ll be attending are appropriately themed to the Abramelin at this stage and that’s all I’m going to say, and the only people who will get that are the initiates in my coven and others. Anyhoo.

I guess the next stresses on my list will be bouncing between two vastly different jobs while wondering when the main one will end and continuing this operation.

Whee.

I have a MASSIVE headache due to muscle strain in my neck and shoulders. Massive.

And now that I can finally sleep in in the morning I totally will.

Evening rite went well.

Abramelin, day 183

Morning and noon rite went well.

Day was spent doing errands and relaxing, night was spent doing kitty cuddle movie night. I found out that I can reduce my kitty’s insulin and I hope in time eliminate it entirely.

I’m exhausted. I’m still dealing with a ton of stuff and I’m realizing how much I’ve completely withdrawn from certain parts of my life. Simplifying in order to deal with what I can.

Evening rite went well.

Abramelin, day 182

Morning rite and noon prayer rite both went well.

Each day that passes at my job I get more and more confirmations that I am probably being set up for failure, not deliberately or maliciously but because the heads are batshit, neurotic, paranoid, and can’t communicate well worth a damn to technical staff. Another coworker admitted he thought my boss was nuts for putting my project deadline where it’s at, and I KNOW it’s coming from above him at least but it doesn’t excuse how batshit it is.

As for the personal, spiritual, psychic shit and all of the dreams and crap…in waayyyy over my head. Not sure what’s more overwhelming: what’s inside or what’s outside. I wonder if this tension is deliberate. At least my kitties are okay. Made appointment for the glucose tolerance test. Fingers crossed.

Evening rite went well, was high after.

Gods help me.

Abramelin, day 181

Morning rite and noon prayer rite went well.

Job situation holding steady so far, but will be glad to be done with this commute. I still anticipate more drama before it’s over unfortunately. It’s just the nature of these things.

My kitty’s blood work came back, and she’s doing far better than expected. Well enough to say that she will be in remission from diabetes and can go off of insulin soon. They want to do a glucose tolerance test to be sure. FANTASTIC news! Meanwhile she has energy I haven’t seen her have in years.

I have another massively intense personal situation on hold or at least as much of it on hold as I can get it. Shit’s accelerating/hitting the fan/descending into chaos in pretty much every area right now so I take any and all good news wherever I can get it. I have a grandmother with rapidly advancing Alzheimer’s and that’s also creating another situation of drama I’m staying as far away from as possible. I don’t think she’ll last another year unfortunately.

I need a break, a staycation, spa day, something.

Evening rite went well.

 

Abramelin, day 176

Morning rite went well.

I feel somewhat less stressed and a bit relieved. I saw the job thing going south as of that hideous meeting/design review some weeks ago with my boss’ boss who was a total asshole to me and the other new person. And the commute’s the worst I’ve ever had and that’s saying something. I’m looking forward to being someplace far better.

I didn’t get much done today, but the weather was just crappy. Good day for tea and kitty cuddles. My father will be in town again to help out with the kitty vet appointment and my car’s getting appraised on Monday so I know what the damage cost will be for repair.

Things are kinda snowballing and I need a bit of a break.

Evening rite went well.

Abramelin, day 175

Morning rite and noon prayer rite both went well.

I had it all but confirmed for me today; my boss told me the reason for the aggressive deadline on my project is that it’s expensive to have me. It’s not me, it’s the agency fee. I don’t see them converting me to perm or being able to afford me perm either. I’m pretty sure now I’m not going to have this job after Oct.

I’m both relieved and stressed. Fun, huh?

Well, if I’m right then the completion of this rite will coincide nicely with Samhain.

In the meantime, my cat is doing very well. One more week of oral meds plus a checkup.

Evening rite went well.

Abramelin, day 172

Morning rite went well, as did noon prayer rite. Walk after.

I don’t recall my dreams last night; I went to sleep VERY early and slept through almost the entire night straight.

They want me done with my current project at work by mid-Oct, originally slated as being “a bit too aggressive”. Now suddenly it isn’t. I don’t feel good about this change, and I’m wondering if I’ll be out of a job come November.

My cats continue to be okay, and the dear lil diabetic one is handling her shots VERY well. The oral meds, not so much. I adjusted my work schedule to compensate so I’ll have more than enough time in the morning to work out, take care of her, and get my shit together.

I’ve been losing weight and not on purpose. I swear I’m eating but I’m just too stressed to eat at normal levels. I’m hoping with the increased workouts in the morning it’ll increase my appetite and this won’t be a problem.

I’m fried. Totally fried.

Evening rite went well.